As a mentor, you play a very important role in a young person’s life. Together, we’ll ensure you’re part of a strong, safe, healthy, and enjoyable match. Please complete this questionnaire so we can be sure to provide you the best support for your mentoring relationship. Thank you! We appreciate your time.
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Section A - YOU AND BIG BROTHERS BIG SISTERS

This section assesses your knowledge of the following Key Messages: You’re committing to the expected duration of the program. The essential members of the match are you, your mentee, their parent/guardian, program staff, and, for some site-based programs, the school liaison. Matches have a beginning, middle, and end: each stage is equally important.
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It’s OK to occasionally cancel scheduled meetings as long as I let the essential match members know.
A big goal of a match is to have fun and laugh together.
I only meet with program staff when things are not going well.
As a mentor, it is my role to change my mentee’s life for the better.
Shared decision-making is something to strive for.
I need to manage my own expectations of my mentee and our match.
It’s OK to have my mentee bring friends or siblings when we get together.
I should see my mentee as often as I like.
Mentees join the program only if they want to have a mentor.
Early match closure can do harm to my mentee.
I’ll probably get a lot of positive feedback from my mentee.
Here’s a reminder of the topics you might talk with program staff about: match activities and accomplishments any questions or concerns I may have feedback on how my mentee is feeling setting and respecting boundaries clarification on program rules helpful information, such as resources you may be interested in information on agency activities effective adult-child communication

Section B - HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS

This section assesses your knowledge of the following Key Messages: Safe, healthy relationships pave the way for strong, supportive matches. It is important for all match participants to exercise their voice and choice. Communication with young people can be challenging, yet it is very important.
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Healthy relationships emphasize safety, communication, trust, fun, respect.
Mentees and mentors must be comfortable exercising their voice and choice.
Your voice, body language and expression are as important as your words.
If my mentee’s behaviour has been challenging I should cancel our next outing.
Listening skills are as important as communication skills.
It’ll be obvious to me when I’m having a positive impact on my mentee.
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Gently encourage my mentee to share their feelings.
Change the subject to not upset my mentee further.
Respect my mentee’s privacy unless I have evidence or suspicion of abuse.
Contact program staff if my mentee is uncharacteristically reluctant to talk.

Section C - SECURE AND RESILIENT

This section assesses your knowledge of the following Key Messages: All match participants will set boundaries, which much be respected. Talk with your mentee about their Circle of Support, and be alert to secrets and risky behaviour. As adults, we have a duty to report abuse if it is disclosed to us or if we have reason to suspect abuse.
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The gradual breaking down of boundaries can lead to unsafe relationships.
Children who are equipped with an understanding of personal boundaries are less likely to be exploited or victimized.
My mentee and I need to understand and respect each other’s boundaries.
Consistency breaking or stretching agency policies is boundary-breaking behaviour.
It’s ok to get changed (e.g., to go swimming) in front of my mentee.
If an essential match members sets boundaries I don't agree with it's ok to ignore them.
Pity and guilt can be examples of an unhealthy relationship.
I don’t need to talk with my mentee about their Circle of Support because his or her parents/guardians and program staff take care of that.
It’s ok to give my mentee inexpensive gifts occasionally.
I need to respect my mentee’s confidentiality.
It’s ok for me to ask my mentee to keep a secret.
It’s ok for me to hug my mentee.
The stronger and more resilient my mentee is, the more likely they are to make healthy decisions
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I should disregard what they say if I don't think they're telling the truth.
I should immediately notify the appropriate authorities, including my Big Brothers Big Sisters agency.
I should listen carefully and accept what the young person is telling me.
I should offer comfort and support and control my reaction.
It is not my role to verify the abuse – I should not ask probing questions.
I should try to find out if the young person was doing anything to cause or encourage the abuse.
I should tell the child what to do and not to do to avoid this situation again.
I should tell the young person it is not their fault and praise them for telling me.
I should tell them I am going to help them get the support they need.
If they ask me to keep it a secret I should tell them honestly that I’m unable to do so.
Whether or not I’m a professional, I am legally obligated to report abuse or suspected abuse.
Together, we can ensure ALL relationships are HEALTHY relationships. Here is a reminder of some of the things you discussed in your training session. There are several different types of abuse, including physical, neglect, sexual, bullying, and emotional abuse. There can be verbal and non-verbal disclosures of abuse. Disclosure can often take a long time, and may involve some telling and then retracting. A person who discloses abuse may feel ashamed and/or scared. If you have any questions about abuse, suspected abuse or reporting, you can speak with your program staff or contact your local child protection agency.
Thank you for your time and your commitment to a healthy mentoring relationship.
I shall certify that I have completed Strong from the Start, Big Brothers Big Sisters' Pre-Match Training. The training was provided by Big Brothers Big Sisters of London and Area.
Name
The training was delivered
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